I stood at the front of the room, hands at my sides with my chest pushed out. It was the first presentation training in my new role as a sales account manager. I had rehearsed for days in preparation for this moment. I wanted to impress my new teammates with my knowledge and engagement. However, it was also very surreal. Just months earlier I was interviewing in Dallas with multiple companies as an Alliance candidate. Now I was in a world of high expectations and abundant opportunity, anxious to get started.
Several individuals entered the room, each sitting at similar distance. It was almost as they wanted to minimize the amount of open space to test my nerves. I could feel my anxiety rise as the lights dimmed and the projector beemed at the nondescript walls acting as a spotlight directed at my position.
“You waiting on us Navy man?” my boss, Matt, asked with a sarcastic grin.
I took a deep breath.
“Hi everyone, I am Kacey Kemmerer, an Account Manager here at Empirix. With me today is…”
“Stop,” Matt said, “you forgot something.”
I stared at Matt bewildered.
”You forgot to tell them you are a veteran,” he stated, “it means something in this country, people respect your service and will grant you instant credibility.”
From that day forward, every sales presentation included a quick mention of my veteran status. I cannot tell you how many times someone politely interrupted me with a story of their family member who was a veteran or currently serving. I could hear the pride in their voice as they described their loved one’s dedication and sacrifice to our country. That immediate connection cut the tension in the room, enabling a stronger sense of togetherness. Ori Brafman’s book, Click, calls this phenomenon the “Law of Similarity,” where people with similar experiences are able to accelerate their emotional connection.
About a year later, I was working my first complex sale with a Fortune 500 financial services company. The client agreed to move forward and introduced us to the sourcing team for negotiation. Over the next two weeks, the lead negotiator, John, “beat me down” on the price and terms. Dejected, I called my boss, Mark, to ask for coaching and help.
“Mark, this guy is ferocious,” I said, “I do not know what to do.”
”Let me call him,” he said in his always upbeat tone.
About an hour later, my mobile phone rang.
”Kacey, it is Mark, just spoke to John, did you tell him you were a veteran?”
”Mark, you know what, I don’t think I did.”
Over the next couple minutes, Mark described John’s previous 20 year career as a Marine Corps Officer with multiple deployments around the world. Marc told John about our Junior Military Officer (JMO) program and how I was the first hire into sales. Mark encouraged me to call him immediately.
I called John that afternoon and the tone of our conversation changed dramatically – he went from being my worst nightmare to the amenable opposition, wanting to secure the best price and terms for his organization but in a manner of mutual respect. We talked about our time in the military and shared a few stories, including a common gym visited in Washington DC. The call ended with John agreeing to “wrap up the deal” quickly. About 2 weeks later, we received the signed order documents.
I tell this story for the following reason.
You are about to embark on an incredible journey. Do not hesitate to share your story with the new people you meet. Humility is a virtue but not at the expense of your service. Your veteran status coupled with the Law of Similarity will create and accelerate relationships. Be proud of your service and your service will enable you.